Monday, June 20, 2011

A Full Plate of Life & A Whole Lot of Stress

Will: I read your book last night.
Sean: So you're the one.  
~from the movie "Good Will Hunting"

It's been a small amount of time.  Not too long, but a bit of time has passed since my last post.  Nothing much has happened since then in the ways of writing.

I still have my two novels that I'm working on (the one I started a couple years ago as well as the one I started for NaNoWriMo last year) though lately it hasn't been so much writing as it has been thinking about writing.

I'm going through one of those stuck periods where I have all this crap going on in my head - some of it writing - and I can't seem to get it sorted so I can tap into that writing bit in my noggin and... you know... write.

I've also been sick which took a LOT out of me.  Usually it's just insomnia messing with me, but it's been my sinuses, my innards, my bones...

I got a cold from... somewhere.  I couldn't breathe and I couldn't stop coughing for the life of me.  I would have coughing fits constantly.  One night I coughed so hard, I brought up bile (didn't have much appetite during the bad days) and phlegm and other nasty things.  My chest hurt as did my back.  My throat ached and burned.  If I could talk at all, I sounded like a man or some deviant that would cause you to lock up your children and have 911 on speed dial.

Whenever I laid down, I'd start coughing.  Later I had to lay on my back because laying on my side would start a fit.  I got some cough suppressant and took double the dosage each time.  I think it kind of worked but the cough would always come back.

It eventually got better, lessening slowly as time went on.  Then it became that annoying dry cough that just wouldn't go away.

I joked that with all the coughing I was doing, I should at least have some "no pain, no gain" results to show for it.  In my reality, I should be sporting a six-pack right now.

But no... it's still a keg.  *sigh*

Also around this craptastic time, I experienced my power loss so that made everything extra special.  (Yes, that was sarcasm for those textually-nuance-inept.)

I hate being sick.  Congestion made it hard to read due to the pressure in my head and nose.  I couldn't even properly daydream or plot out storylines in my head since it hurt to try and conjure something and then a cough would erase all my hard work like Unicron or Galactus destroying worlds and realities.

Oh good gravy!  Did I just go there?

So power loss + sick + insomnia = no writing for yours truly.

The good news now is that I feel better, and I'm writing again.

I am presently trying to write a 700 word limit story for a contest due in a couple months as well as... (wait for it)... participating in Clarion West Write-A-Thon.  It started yesterday and goes until July 29th (I think).  People can sponsor me (translation: donate to Clarion West... the link I provided is to my personal page).

We were encouraged to create goals that were a little stretch for us.

My goal?

At a Terry Pratchett event, he spoke of how he tried to write everyday since he felt he couldn't truly call himself a writer if he didn't in fact write.  (Then he was just a lazy bum.  His words, not mine.)  His personal goal was to try and write at least 300 words a day.  I've actually tried to follow in his footsteps and have failed miserably.

So in setting my own personal goal, I made mine a daily goal of 500 words a day.

Yes, yes, yes... I know.  What have I gotten myself into?  And do I have enough alcohol for the journey?  (The answers are "I don't know" and "no".)

My first day I did 500 and change which causes me to high-five myself and my awesomeness, but it's merely day one, and I have so much stress in my life right now, I really wasn't sure if I wanted to do this or not.  I felt that perhaps it was just going to add more stress.

But hey... I'm attempting to remain positive that life will work out in my favor (the extreme sooner, the hella better), and this is my writing after all.  Writing is my passion, my blood... as is music, singing and dance are like my mind, body and soul.

Okay, I'm getting a little deep here.

What do I hope to gain from this little venture (all other stress and depression and grumbleyness aside)?

I'm hoping to get more work on my novel done.  I seem to reach a 100 - 150 page peak and then hit a brick wall.  That's where I was with my last novel and now this one from last November.  I'm hoping beyond hope that these next few weeks I can break through that wall with my mighty Thor hammer of awesomeness and get some work done on my novel to the point of completion.

I also hope to raise some money for Clarion West.  (So please click my name and donate to a worthy cause.  Writers/Writing FTW!!!)

I can do this.  I can.  I know I can.  I just need to get back into my groove.  I need to reconnect with my mojo.

I need to find my Thor hammer.

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